... and that doesn't necessarily mean romantic or sexual.
A friend of mine e-mails me in the middle of the night while feeling philosophical. Understand that although I'm an insomniac who deeply treasures sleep when it happens, I try and make myself quite available for a phone call or message to/from a friend who is going through a difficult time. So I get this message from The Monster (his nickname and he loves it, let it go) and read it, twice. I realize that not only has this message hit me with its own impact, I realize it's done it at a very appropriate time.
A friend of mine e-mails me in the middle of the night while feeling philosophical. Understand that although I'm an insomniac who deeply treasures sleep when it happens, I try and make myself quite available for a phone call or message to/from a friend who is going through a difficult time. So I get this message from The Monster (his nickname and he loves it, let it go) and read it, twice. I realize that not only has this message hit me with its own impact, I realize it's done it at a very appropriate time.
The Monster's Story Of My Life
"Sitting on the kitchen counter, well inebriated, dwelling on the past and obsessing of the future as I look at my glass, seeing part of my troubles, anger, sadness and loneliness in its liquid form waiting to be swallowed and pissed away. Unfortunately that's just temporary as they are soon to reappear at some point for me to repeat this vicious process.
Do nice guys really finish last? Fucking cliches. See right now my very neglected pal Instincts kicks me in the rear reminding me that I should've listened to it and not that dumb fool a.k.a Heart, who by the way, is running out of crazy glue to keep the fucker together. Is that what I'm fated to do the rest of my life, listen to good ol' Instincts? One would say that is the safest route but damn, that sounds like one very lonely road that is coming around the bend and me with no brakes. Pathetic, ain't it? Guess it's punishment for being blind and ignorant and wishing I had listened to those who truly care about me."
We're all human... we all suffer. Male, female, gay, straight, confused, curious, etc. Life throws at us challenges that often make us doubt ourselves, even without us admitting to it. I wonder if it's possible to have a healthy relationship before being romantically clusterfucked... or do we need to clusterfuck ourselves in order to become (someday) fit, ready and willing for a good, stable relationship? Is it all part of a learning process? I wonder.
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